So it here goes........
Do you ever feel your not good enough or your undeserving???? Secretly I feel that way every single day. I believe that's why I sabotage myself in my weigh loss efforts and my efforts in becoming healthy and in shape.
I feel undeserving of my husband and undeserving of my 4 beautiful children.
How did I get this lucky? What did I do to deserve them?
Am I a good enough wife and mother?? NO I'm not or at least this is the way I feel most days I wake up...
Why don't I believe in myself and in my capability to do better and to be better?? Why do I give up on myself?? Do I just not love myself enough to want to be healthy and in shape??
Is it just easier to be FAT?? NO its not so WHY cant I push myself to want better?
Have I really given up on myself have I mentally resigned myself into believing I'm not worthy enough to fight for??
I'm full of all these questions and no way of finding the answers.....
All I really know to do is to continue to pray.. Pray for guidance, pray to be strong , and pray something happens soon.
Until I get the answers I need this is what gets me through..........
2 comments:
You are deserving! You can do anything that you want to do! It's will power and prayer! God is on your side, now you need to be on your side. If you want to lose weight, lose it! It's hard but worth it. Once you establish good habits then it's easy! You've already lost 10 pounds so you know how to do it!
I'll be praying for you!
Mary
Hmmm.... there are people that read your blog. ;-)
Well I wish I could sit down and talk with you and pray for you.
I understand completely and walked in your very shoes for many years.
It won't matter if you weigh 500 or 100 - if you have a wonderful husband, house, kids even a million dollars - you will still feel this way until you are set free from self-hate. It's true - sounds harsh - but it is a reality. We must learn to love and forgive ourselves from "whatever" it is that has us bound before we can find the kind of freedom that is needed to believe in ourself. We have to love ourself - other people loving us won't help - it must must come from the inside of us.
I know the answer - I will help you get there.
Call me if you want freedom.
Love you -
Char
841-7931
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